Superman copes with the election

Once in a while, I submit guest articles to different blogs to help increase my traffic and support my friends’ blogs.  But since my main area of expertise (comics) doesn’t always mesh well with other blog styles, the posts don’t always get approved.  Well, let’s not it go to waste, right?  Here’s an article intended for my favorite left-wing bile-spewing political blog:

So the holidays have arrived and you’ve had a month to reflect on the reelection of Barack Obama.  It’s okay if you’re not happy about it.  The thing about having two sides compete is that one will always lose.  That’s kind of how politics works.  Though after three weeks or so after the election, are you still angry and disappointed?  Probably not on this website, since this site leans towards volatile, stick-prodding liberalism, but you know who’s been in a similar situation as you’re in, Romney fans? Superman.

In 2000, Lex Luthor — the evil, manipulative, wealthy megalomaniac — won the presidency of the United States.  Fairly.

SupermanLexPresident0

Superman’s quite distraught with this news, if only because the president-elect has been trying to kill him ever since the Man of Steel sprouted his first pube. But he can’t do anything about it except learn to adjust.  Luckily, his Justice League buddies have some advice for him – and for you too, I guess. Let’s take a look at select scenes from Superman #165, volume 2, written and drawn by a ton of talented people.

Green Lantern:

SupermanLexPresident2

SupermanLexPresident3

First lesson: The next four years might not be as bad as you think it’ll be.  Optimism amidst reality.

Aquaman:

SupermanLexPresident1

Second lesson: Checks and balances are set up for a reason.  Believe that any lies and broken promises will be paid back in full.  But probably not with armies of mermen.

Flash:

SupermanLexPresident4

SupermanLexPresident5

Third lesson: Obama did win with over 50% of the popular vote.  Trust your fellow countrymen that they’ll do the right thing.  Hopefully.  Also, Superman gives terrible Christmas gifts.

Wonder Woman:

SupermanLexPresident6

SupermanLexPresident7

Fourth lesson: Instead of whining about the loss, use this time to make yourself into someone that can withstand any presidential administration, no matter how much you may loathe them.  I’m thinking stocks and jiu-jitsu.

Batman:

SupermanLexPresident8

SupermanLexPresident9

Final lesson: Bide your time.  And vote.  Batman probably means to vote.

See?  Don’t worry so much!  If Superman can handle his arch-nemesis and confirmed asshole being elected the top position in American politics, then you certainly can.  Enjoy the holidays, stop dwelling on political bitterness, and maybe you should check out Dancing with the Stars again.  Did you know it’s the All-Stars season?



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