Krypto tales
Posted: 10/21/2012 Filed under: Characters, DC 1 CommentYou get it? Tales? As in tails? Yup, that’s the kind of humor you can look forward to on this blog. Anyway, continuing our Superman family theme, let’s talk a bit about the dog.
Krypto’s been around since 1955, and writers haven’t really known what to do with him. He’s a dog with all of Superman’s powers. They gave even gave him his own cape. As the decades past, sometimes Krypto’s intelligence, usage, and strength have changed dramatically. Still, he’s a beloved supporting character in the DC universe, as you can imagine a super pet would be.
He premiered in Adventure Comics #210, edited by Whitney Ellsworth & George Kashdan. But with Superman’s origin firmly established as the last survivor of Krypton, how did his childhood dog get to Earth in the first place?
I love the idea of Superman’s dad saying to his wife, “Honey, no time to explain. I need to shoot the family dog into space.” Followed by the loving wife’s response of, “Well, if you say so, dear.” The 1950s were a silly time.
For most of his time, Krypto guards the Fortress of Solitude, in case the advanced Kryptonian technology and hundreds of guard robots fail to stop intruders. Like in Superman/Batman #9, written by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Michael Turner, during the arc Supergirl gets reintroduced to the DC universe.
Superman keeping the dog trapped in the fortress? Surely the dog needs fresh air, long walks, and human interaction. It’s a dog, for goodness’ sake. Well, I actually have that answer. Y’see, it’s one thing to be an animal and another to be an animal with the same powers as Superman. In Superman #170, volume 2, written by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Dale Keown, naïve Clark Kent has to find out the hard way.
Don’t you hate when you take walks in the park with your wife and super powerful alien warlords stop by? I don’t really have the desire to go into Mongul’s back story, but just think of him as a yellow Darkseid.
Luckily for the residents of Metropolis, Krypto and Superman were on first response.
By the way, that joke may be the funniest thing Superman’s ever said. He’s not known for his sense of humor. In Mongul’s defense, the dog punch meant to show Mongul’s evilness, but he’s certainly entitled to defend himself when attacked by an angry beast. I would never hit an animal if it’s playing catch next to a playground, but my views differ tremendously if the same dog is shooting laser beams at my face.
Okay, so now the odds are stacked against our hero. While Superman deals with the lady behemoth, the dog can settle the grudge with Mongul. Teamwork and whatnot.
If you don’t enjoy a panel where a dog headbutts a supervillain, I don’t want to be your friend.
Unfortunately for both Mongul and Superman, Krypto is just a dog. Instincts and stuff.
Poor Krypto. He defended his master the only way he knew how and for that, he has to be punished.
Well, sad for Krypto. A few years later, obviously feeling a crapload of guilt after abandoning his dog at his frozen secret base, Superman makes a decision in Teen Titans #7, written by Geoff Johns and drawn by Tom Grummett.
Superboy, planning a fresh start in Smallville, receives a visit from his mentor.
Aw, a happy ending for everyone!
On a final note, when the DC universe rebooted last year, Krypto’s origin changed, forcing the dog to be trapped in the Phantom Zone protecting Superman’s family.
But finally in Action Comics #13, written by Grant Morrison and drawn by Travel Foreman, Superman’s dog gets reintroduced perfectly into the brand new universe:
Superman and the Darkseid beatdown
Posted: 10/18/2012 Filed under: DC, Fights 1 CommentContinuing our Superman family theme, I would be a poor commentator if I didn’t bring up the main man himself. Now, I don’t really agree with critics that say the guy’s overpowered. Yes, he’s actually been shown before literally pushing the moon. But with his powers firmly established, the comic book writers adapted accordingly. They introduced weaknesses like kryptonite and magic. They introduced tougher bad guys, including a few that are equal to (if not surprassing) Superman in strength. Like Darkseid.
Darkseid, the evil alien dictator of Apokolips, is the second strongest of Superman’s baddies after Doomsday (I believe). The dude’s been around since 1970 causing trouble with a full-size demon army and an irrational grudge. Oh, and that one time he kidnapped Supergirl in Superman/Batman #11-13, written by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Michael Turner.
Poor Supergirl just got reintroduced a few issues before, yet the young lady didn’t realize her cousin has a rogue gallery hundreds long and with plenty of demented foes willing to steal Superman’s teenage relative. Do these dudes know Superman can push moons? Though today isn’t about Supergirl’s rescue, it is a fantastic way to piss off the Man of Steel.
Eventually Batman saves the day with an immediately played trump card. Y’know, because Darkseid could kill him with a light slap if he wanted.
Satisfying ending for the good guys. Now time to show Supergirl the family farm in Smallville. Introduce her to his parents. Have a home-cooked meal and swap stories of his youth.
Or not.
Let’s be fair. Superman may possibly be the kindest, gentlest superhero in the DC universe. Thank god, too, as he possesses the power to crack the planet in half with a single temper tantrum. Well, until a baddies does something like vaporize his closest living family member before his eyes. The denial stage of grief doesn’t really play a part here. Unfortunately for Darkseid, he goes right to stage two: anger.
Darkseid can certainly hold his own against Superman; that’s part of his success as a supervillain. But that also means Superman doesn’t really have to hold back, hitting Darkseid with the full force of a planet-cracking punch — double-edged sword and whatnot.
I want to call this a fight, but Superman spends the rest of the time destroying Darkseid. You can read the book (or watch the animated movie) for the whole thing. In true Superman fashion, Darkseid endures not only a savage beating, but also a cliched moral lecture. And trust me, those lectures are what make Superman, in my unreliable opinion, the perfect definition of a superhero.
You know the best part of brutally taking down egotistical dictators? The whimpering disbelief.
Superman won’t kill. He won’t even torture. But he will imprison you in a magical place filled with monster statues for the rest of eternity. Big difference, I promise.
As you learned from the last article, Supergirl’s totally still alive and kicking butt. They faked her death. Add an Oscar to Superman’s Pulitzer Prize collection. Most importantly, this arc has my absolute favorite thing in comics: a happy ending.
I mean, a happy ending and Martian Manhunter doing carpentry.
Supergirl fights Luthor, JLA, Supergirl
Posted: 10/16/2012 Filed under: DC, Fights 4 CommentsOn Monday, we dealt with Supergirl’s alternative, bustier twin. Let’s check in with the real deal.
The history of Supergirl (real name Kara Zor-El) may actually be one of the most complicated histories in the history of DC. She’s gone through so many weird iterations and origin changes that I can’t begin to explain (or understand) it. But in 2004, they reset her origin in Superman/Batman #8, once again making her Superman’s cousin that was trapped in her spaceship’s suspended animation for decades. Hence why she immediately has her Kryptonian powers (that Superman developed throughout puberty) and she’s the same age as when she got evacuated from Krypton (still sixteen years-old despite Superman having aged thirty-five years or so).
And if you get a chance, definitely read her introduction arc in Superman/Batman. It’s so good they made an animated movie about it. Lots of cool fights. Batman threatening Darkseid. An evil Supergirl. Unfortunately for Kara, that whole evil persona thing didn’t really get solved until Supergirl #3-5, written by Jeph Loeb and drawn by Ian Churchill.
Baby steps, though. First, she decides to have a chat with Lex Luthor. If you’re not caught up on comics, this is not your grandpa’s Luthor. No longer the zany mad scientist with a bitter grudge, Luthor has evolved brilliantly in the past few decades into an extremely capable, powerful psychopath with a bitter grudge.
Megalomania aside, don’t mess with Luthor. He’s Superman’s arch-nemesis for a reason. That and one more trick up his sleeve.
Did you know black kryptonite creates a second Supergirl that’s all foul and no sunshine?
With a single punch, the fight changes setting to the Justice League Watchtower on the moon. She hits hard. You don’t get to see the JLA fight, sadly (buy the book for that), but just know that evil Supergirl takes down Green Lantern, Flash, Hawkman, Black Canary, and Martian Manhunter by herself. It’s impressive. Finally, the real Supergirl recovers and joins the fight.
Evil Supergirl still going strong and the JLA about to take a second beating, Kara brings to fight to the one person that she knows can defeat her evil twin.
Round 2, begin.
You can click the picture for a bigger version if the text’s hard to read. With evil Kara now outnumbered four-to-one, each of her opponents absolutely capable of defeating her, she switches her strategy. To sneakiness.
Which one’s the real Supergirl? I dunno, the one smugly smirking? Superman, not exactly the world’s greatest detective, figures he’ll solve the problem the only way he knows how.
And now witness one of the coolest Superman moments in comics. You may bash Superman for his blatant morality, clumsy secret identity, and underwear outside the pants, but you can never bash him for his strength. The most powerful being on the planet.
Nothing better than Superman putting someone in his or her place. Realizing the gravity of the situation, the Supergirls agree to be magically bound by Wonder Woman and take their 50/50 chance of replacing the other one.
The winner? Duh, you already know the answer, but it’s much more fun to have it decided in a dramatic, totally necessary explosion. Feel good stuff. Plus, just like all good teenager stories, she even recites the life lesson she learned on today’s episode. Listen for the music to swell.
Now officially a genuine superhero. Saving the day as soon as she finishes biology class.
Power Girl and the alien Fabio
Posted: 10/14/2012 Filed under: DC, Relationships 1 Comment(Author note: Due to recent time constraints, I have to lower the amount of posts per week in order to maintain both the quality of the comic selections and quality of my commentary. I hope you understand and remember, I’ll always love you.)
You know about Power Girl? I mean, I don’t want to be rude, but she and her Justice Society comrades are certainly less popular than their Justice League buddies. Basically, she’s an alternative world Supergirl that became stuck on Earth after her dimension disappeared.
Here’s her first appearance back in 1976’s All-Star Comics #58, written by Gerry Conway and drawn by Ric Estrada and Wally Wood.
Her most popular feature are her, well, bustier assets. Seriously, her costume actually contains a hole just for her cleavage. But outfit aside, in 2009, she received her own solo series and it was delightful. I loved every issue of it. The series maintained exciting action, interesting characters, and most importantly, a wonderful sense of humor.
Now, it’s not rude to ask if you’ve heard of Vartox, because he’s quite a minor character. He had his first appearance in 1974’s Superman #281, written by Cary Bates and drawn by Curt Swan & Bob Oksner. His costume alone tells more about this character than words ever could:
Amazing, right? The horrible upward angle that emphasizes his package. The underwear and vest combo added with his hairy chest. That 1970s porn ‘stache. This character must have required an amazing amount of “help” to come up with.
Well, he returns in Power Girl #7-8, written by Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti and drawn by Amanda Conner, remaking his character exactly how he should have been in the first place. First, a little alien back story.
No way this can’t go badly. Look, if you’re seducing a Superman relative, gotta go big or go home.
Seduction not going as planned. But when a foreign man wearing nothing but a space vest and a speedo, the ritual will certainly move to Plan B. Not a pun.
You know what always brings superhero couples together? Fight banter, of course.
So you know how in comics the initial disdain of a team-up eventually turns to understanding and blossoming love? Not really having that effect here. Though we all know any man with a Hulk Hogan mustache has a Plan C ready to go.
Okay, let him explain.
You see what a dash of sensitivity and charm can do? Now he can drop the stud charade and get to know Power Girl as a caring, loving individual.
Or not. Despite never really being anything but disgusted by the man, Power Girl does warm up to him. Slightly. After they get pizza for dinner, the true reason for the quick mating process reveals itself. And c’mon, Vartox really just seeks the continued prosperity of his own sexy planet. That’s what being a sexy ruler is all about.
Luckily for both of them, Vartox’s alien species doesn’t require that normal physical intimacy. Mainly because Power Girl can’t bring herself to desire either of those.
How sweet! Because she never has to actually touch the dude, saving an entire planet with her uterus energy has some legitimate appeal. Suckered into good deeds is part of the superhero code.
Do you see the beauty of this arc? Vartox, the misogynist, reckless alien king, becomes humanized and almost sympathetic by the end. I adore it.
Thankfully, not the last time we see the promiscuous alien either. About four issues later, Vartox appears briefly once more in Power Girl #12, written and drawn by the same creative team.
The good will gained between Vartox and our protagonist? When you bring a giant monster to Power Girl’s city a second time, any niceties tend to fade away.
Though if Vartox could gain her trust the first time, surely he could turn on that charm again?
Oh well. Probably for the best.
Ultimates vs. Hulk
Posted: 10/11/2012 Filed under: Fights, Marvel 1 CommentWe’ve had a long week, so let’s end it with a fistfight. No better way to end a comic book week than with a beatdown.
In Ultimates #5, written by Mark Millar and drawn by Bryan Hitch, the Ultimate Marvel universe’s answer to the Avengers, the team of lovable superheroes goes up against a perverted Hulk. It’s been a good eighty articles since I’ve talked about the alternative universe. I hope you don’t mind if I recycle text from my third ever article:
A little backstory is required that hopefully won’t take too long. In the “normal” Marvel universe, it’s unwritten but implied that most of the heroes have been fighting evil for like upwards of fifteen years or more. For instance, Spider-Man is most likely in his late 20s. Iron Man and Captain America are probably around 35. So how does Marvel attract younger readers when all the most popular characters are the same ages as their dads? Well, the company attempted to solve that problem. They created a new “side” universe, called Ultimate Marvel. There, the characters were reintroduced as younger, and their origin stories were re-calibrated for a modern era. Ultimate Spider-Man was the first comic they tried, making Peter Parker a 15-year old kid who gets his powers from a genetically altered spider and works for The Daily Bugle as their webmaster.
Nowadays, Ultimate Marvel is a shell of what it used to be, and they’ve used crossover events to pretty much destroy large sections of the planet and kill off over half the major characters. But we’re going back to the beginning, when the universe still had all its tools in the arsenal.
One-by-one the Ultimates tackle the Hulk in all his insanely powerful glory. First up: Giant Man.
Well, that went badly. Since we’re witnessing the first real struggle against the Hulk, the Ultimates don’t fully know his true levels of strength. They’ll find out very quickly. Plan A, consisting of cupping the Hulk in giant hands, went awry quickly. Underestimation noted; time to tag in one of the heavy hitters. Meet Iron Man.
Iron Man dutifully and goo-ily doing his part. Time to wrap this fight up, and the best way to take care of a monster problem? You can do far worse than Captain America.
He dropped a tank on him. That he was sitting in. The Ultimates rock. Unfortunately 70 tons of metal dropped from an excessive height doesn’t even begin to slow down the Hulk’s rampage. If all else fails, punch him in the face.
Luckily, the Ultimates roster isn’t completely empty. With all the traditional means of beatdown exhausted, only option left is to meet Hulk on a power level equal to his own. Like say, the god of Thunder, Thor.
Correct answer’s yes. But for whatever godforsaken reason, the Hulk still stands. Angrier.
Y’see, we still have one final Ultimate left. And while Wasp’s power to become miniature seems useless against a beast that one-hit KO’d her fifty-foot husband, there’s one (small) advantage to her powers and the final chance to tip the battle in favor of our heroes.
One of the Ultimates will need a bath after this.
The keg of manpower has been tapped. No more juice left in this superhero blender left to take on any remnant of Hulk that remains flailing. Luckily, a knowledge of neurology has prevailed over brute force. Let that be a lesson, children.
A feel good ending if I’ve seen one. Have a great weekend.
Professor X’s Rogue redemption
Posted: 10/10/2012 Filed under: Marvel 3 CommentsRemember a few weeks ago when we found out that Professor X has always secretly been a jerk? He was subtly influencing, controlling, and erasing people’s memories. Not nice at all coming from the man who’s the moral compass of the X-Men. But despite all his mistakes, at least he can make up for one of them.
Today, we’re looking at X-Men Legacy #220-224, written by Mike Carey and drawn by Scott Eaton.
Gambit’s been traveling with the professor for a few issues now. Being one step from hobo, Gambit doesn’t have a busy schedule. So when Rogue disappeared a while ago, Professor X figured he could kill two birds with one stone. And where is she?
In a weird twist, Mystique possesses Rogue’s mind as a motivational figment of her imagination. This arc is strange. Lots of crazy stuff. Like this:
Danger, the actual robotic manifestation of the former X-Men Mansion’s Danger Room and now a powerful supervillain, ambushes poor Rogue while an alien spaceship filled with jolly pirates or something launches a simultaneous attack. Can’t really meditate through this mess.
When Professor X and Gambit arrive in the abandoned desert town, they find their memories come to life. I’m no scientist, but whenever that happens, something’s gone terribly wrong.
Did you know Professor X has hairy knuckles? You learn new things everyday. Also I absolutely adore that Gambit’s in full costume while Xavier’s outfit looks like he didn’t get fully changed after leaving the gym. Plus, he has knee pads for whatever possible reason, though if you just miraculously recovered from paralysis, no harm in putting some extra armor on those beautiful legs.
As you can guess, the story splits. Gambit and Professor X travel through their magical adventure while occasionally the scene shifts back to Rogue and imagination Mystique as they parade around in dangerous memories. First up, let’s get a little through the men’s side.
Y’know those aliens in that alien spaceship? Found them. The rest of the story goes as you expect:
Rogue goes through something rather similar:
Eventually the cause of all those pesky memories punching our heroes is revealed:
A sentient Danger Room filled with a crapload of training scenarios combined with a brewing vengeance can lead to wacky situations. Luckily, the good professor knows how to solve this problem.
Look, flashbacks and reality skewed tends to make me glaze over. As long as stuff doesn’t get super weird, I’ll keep going.
Nevermind, I’m skipping to the end.
So stuff happens. Eventually, those aliens betray our heroes and take down all three superheroes and Danger. Right as the situation becomes its bleakest, Professor X plays his trump card. Turns out being the founder of the X-Men gave him some special privileges, like Danger Room override codes.
Victory! As delightful as a march through the fantasy land can be, that’s not enough for me to write an article about. With Rogue found, Professor X has one final bit of redemption to do. Y’see, to get Rogue to join the X-Men in the first place, Xavier lied and told Rogue he could cure her (that power that drains life from everyone she touches). He could not. He knew he could not. Now with Danger’s help, Professor X found the solution. Only a decade or two of emotional misery later.
Since mutant powers activate during adolescence, if a horrible event (like kissing a boy into a coma) occurred during activation, a psychological barrier could prevent the mutant from complete mastery of his or her powers. Think of it like burying trauma to prevent a psychological breakdown. Well, Professor X believes he can psychically enter her mind and destroy the traumatic barrier that prevents Rogue from fully controlling her powers.
I have to be honest with you; science goes over my head. Too much complicated terminology and biological processes. But I can say without a doubt in my mind, that a hypnosis/therapy combination does not, and will not, ever involve a doctor fighting a knife-wielding supervillain while purple and naked.
I just think the scene would still be just as awesome if Professor X wore underwear. Still, with the fake Mystique purged from Rogue’s psyche, has she overcome her instinctual powers and transformed them into the on-off switch she always dreamed?
Good enough answer, right? Rogue can now touch people with her bare skin with zero life draining. How exciting! Next up, hair dye?
Jailbreak: Winter Soldier
Posted: 10/09/2012 Filed under: Characters, Marvel Leave a commentActually, Bucky Barnes is still sort of Captain America. The last throes of an obligated dream.
A few years, Captain America was shot and killed lost in time (happens more than you think). Bucky, recently returned from the dead as Winter Soldier, took over the role. Unfortunately, in the past seventy years since World War II, he had been brainwashed as the most dangerous assassin in Mother Russia. So when his secret killings of top American officials and such came to light, he was arrested not only as a former Soviet spy, but also in Russia as a traitor to their country. Russians just don’t appreciate their people becoming the moral and patriotic symbol of their biggest enemy.
We start our arc with Bucky trapped in a Russian gulag in Captain America #616-619, written by Ed Brubaker and drawn by five awesome artists.
You mean to tell me that American prisons don’t have prisoners battle in gladiator fights against superhuman bears? That’s Ursa Major, the Russian superhero I’ve covered in a previous article. And despite any real need for it, the arena battle has a totally reasonable explanation.
Bucky being super famous and all, the Avengers don’t have the diplomatic authority to rescue him and Russian officials can’t just go and have him executed. Politics are tricky, even for those who make their living by punching. So the prison warden has an idea. A mischievous idea.
How about that? Unfortunately, Bucky used to be Captain America, and that dude’s fought Hulks. Versus a bear? That’s park ranger stuff.
Bucky fights like three battles. You can read the book for the rest. But I’d be a horrible commentator if I didn’t show you the mandatory flashback of past crimes compiled in a cool panel page.
See? He did a bunch of awful stuff while brainwashed, the haircut not included. He certainly deserves to be punished, and Bucky wouldn’t mind serving out his time in peace. But you know that can’t happen because you read comic books.
Someone doesn’t respect authority.
Winter Soldier has mastered dozens of martial arts and served four years on the front lines of World War II as a teenager, but he also doesn’t have any superpowers. That metal arm is just that. Still, can’t break that superhero spirit.
Yup, no winning this one. Time for the jailbreak advertised in the title of this article.
The best part of the comic book reader is the complete suspension of disbelief. We have no problem that gods with hammers and giant green rage monsters run around totally scientifically sound in the Marvel universe. When we see a giant Russian with an eye on his forehead that shoots lasers, not one of us will bat an eye. Winter Soldier fights a bald Cyclops supervillain. Sounds good to us.
Some hidden benefits of seventy years of Russian brainwashing? Black Widow being your sexy co-worker, for one. She came from the same program, which teaches espionage, deceit, and sass.
Happy ending! Bucky escapes the gulag to live his life as a fugitive of the law with his rebellious record stricken only in his death. Luckily very soon after this, he gets fake-killed by Sin during Fear Itself. Not a bad way to fake-go.
Therapy with Batman & Nightwing
Posted: 10/08/2012 Filed under: Characters, DC 6 CommentsAnother Nightwing post! I promise the last one of the week (I can’t promise that).
Sorry in advance for the huge chunk of back story. Y’see, back in the early 1980s, Dick Grayson grew tired of being Robin, now 17 years-old and no longer a little hatchling. He announced his situation to Batman, who responded with his same emotional vacancy that he normally does, prompting Grayson to quit and don the Nightwing costume. Bruce Wayne and Grayson eventually grew close again, but only after Nightwing firmly established himself as a successful solo superhero.
Unfortunately in 1993, Bane broke Batman’s back and forced the Dark Knight into retirement. Azrael, the insane psychopathic religious zealot, was chosen by Wayne to be his successor. Terrible idea. Azrael (real name Jean Paul Valley) created a mecha-Batman suit, abused Robin, and killed bad guys. Wayne, feeling better after a magical chiropractor, fought Azrael for supremacy and gained back his Batcave and title.
Unfortunately again, Batman’s still feeling a bit woozy from all that former paralysis and needs to take some more time off, allowing Grayson to assume the role for a short while. When Wayne returns and demands his costume back, Grayson’s emotional geyser erupts in anger and frustration. Our story picks up with the final issue of the Prodigal arc in Robin #13, written by the genius Chuck Dixon and drawn by John Cleary and Phil Jimenez.
Oh, the green text boxes are Robin stuff I’ve cut out. He’s busy fighting supervillains.
To be fair to Wayne, he is legitimately stunted emotionally as trauma leftover from the death of his parents. While the Grayson family’s deaths are no less tragic, he’s not consumed in a permanent cloud of guilt and vengeance like his mentor. Plus, it’s been a decade of comics with really zero closure on the ending of their Batman-Robin partnership.
For being the world’s greatest detective, Batman certainly has a hard time detecting hurt feelings. Though despite Nightwing’s verbal sucker punch, Batman’s explanation stands true to his character.
Batman needs therapy. Badly. Instead, he takes out his problems by putting his fist through the faces of bad guys. See it through Batman’s eyes. Every minute Wayne sits on a couch rattling on to a scribbling doctor, another illegal gun is being sold, another helpless man is being beaten, and another supervillain is planning to torch the city. Also, do you know how long it takes to zip-line to Gotham?
C’mon, Batman. Tell Nightwing your true feelings. What does he really mean to you?
And there you go. Grayson, after a decade of feeling neglected, pushed away, and rejected by Wayne, finally hears exactly where he belongs in Batman’s life. Closure granted. Broken heart healed.
And Robin? While the two have their bonding moment, surely he’s not in terrible peril and desperately needs their help, right?
On a final note, you may know that Darkseid killed Batman a few years ago. Well, more like shot Batman’s soul into the depths of space and time, but close enough. Grayson took over the Batman role for real, now completely deserving as the only true successor. And fans loved it. His few years as the Dark Knight alongside Batman’s son Damien as Robin were critically loved and applauded. Plus, he brought a kind of energy to the character that hasn’t been seen since, well, ever.
You see that? A happy Batman.
Jailbreak: Nightwing
Posted: 10/07/2012 Filed under: Characters, DC 4 CommentsIt’s the 100th post and to celebrate, we’re going to read my favorite comic book scenario: superheroes breaking out of prison. I adore the idea of superheroes escaping out of somewhere inescapable while surrounded by enemies and inevitably always ending up in gigantic fistfight mob climax. Delightful reading every time.
Since we’ve been sticking with a theme the past few days, let’s continue the Batman event No Man’s Land with a little Nightwing side story (real name Dick Grayson, the original Robin). Y’see, since Batman now has to patrol and protect his lawless anarchic city from the dozen or so crime gangs and supervillains causing trouble, sometimes he needs to outsource a few missions to his buddies. Let’s take a look at Nightwing #35-37, written by Chuck Dixon and drawn by Scott McDaniel.
Someone doesn’t like backtalk. I imagine Batman has the money to buy gas grenades and new bat-mobiles because he cuts cost in manpower, such as sending just one non-superpowered acrobat alone into battle against the most dangerous prison in Gotham.
Even Nightwing can’t disobey Batman. The Dark Knight doesn’t take rejection well. And actually, the prison plan that Nightwing and Oracle come up with is pretty solid. Grayson’ll infiltrate the prison, take the place of the inmate who looks the most like him, and then ambush Lock Up’s crew one-by-one until the prison comes under Nightwing’s command. He gets as far as the second step.
Nightwing’s biggest strength lies not with his brilliant mind (that’s Tim Drake), or his calculated ruthlessness (Jason Todd), but instead with his natural physical gifts. It’s been stated on more than one occasion that Nightwing’s even faster than Batman. Well, like by a fraction, but still faster. Surely he can outrun the rifle of a hollerin’ stereotype.
Oh, KGBeast! The ridiculously outdated USSR relic premiered three years before the fall of the Soviet Union as a master assassin terrorizing Gotham. He even has a cool gun or sword hand, depending on his fancy. Yes, the guy’s intimidating and powerful, but KGBeast’s also been beaten by preteen Robin twice. So, y’know.
Stuck between a Russian behemoth and the fast approaching cowboy twins, Grayson makes a call.
A bad call.
A very bad call.
The prison takeover plan a bust, Nightwing’ll have to improvise. I mean, how bad can it possibly get?
I love comics because of situations like this one, where Nightwing’s now trapped in an impenetrable basement pit with twenty enraged baddies. You and I get to wonder how he’ll get out of this mess, even more so after the villains realize that Batman ain’t coming to rescue them. They get stuck with the former Boy Wonder. What a terribly rude way for Batman to treat all those people he’s given concussions.
Batman’s rogue gallery has some weirdos. Luckily the Dark Knight trains his sidekicks in critical thinking and environment analysis when they’re not doing backflips over crocodile men.
Favorite panel in the entire arc. Nothing like the pure glee of a BDSM supervillain so minor, you can count all of his issue appearances on one hand. With Nightwing’s first plan shattered into pieces, why not go for a double?
Grayson conquered a pit full of murderous supervillains. Can he prevail over Mother Nature next?
We’re speeding towards Grayson’s great escape, because as you’ve probably figured out, Nightwing’s safety depends pretty heavily on the containment of the prisoners. Thugs and supervillains totally have goldfish memory. That or an inability to properly thank the good-looking, athletic, young man who bloodied and shipped them off to the police in the first place.
He totally showed those prisoners. Can you taste the salty fresh air that awaits? The seagulls squawking as they swoop down for their breakfast? Not if a plot twist hat trick can help it.
Definitely the coolest superhero/supervillain suspended by chains in midair fight you’ve ever seen, right? Time to clean up the rest of the trash, and then report back to Batman’s approving scowl.
Y’know, this arc actually leads up to the Ballistic Romance story, where Nightwing meets up with his rejected lover Huntress again while rekindling his relationship with Oracle at the same time as battling a rogue police hit squad. It’s awesome.
I bet Batman makes Alfred sew all the uniforms back together.
Huntress and Scarecrow go to church
Posted: 10/04/2012 Filed under: Characters, DC Leave a commentWhy not another Huntress post? She doesn’t even exist anymore in current DC continuity, the poor girl. Originally, Helena Wayne, the alternative Earth daughter of Batman and Catwoman, took the name Huntress. And when the DC universe rebooted, Helena Wayne popped up again, erasing Helena Bertinelli like next morning’s bad Indian food. Oh well. We still get to celebrate Bertinelli’s previous adventures at least.
Some back story, really fast. In the late 90s, a massive earthquake struck Gotham City, ruining the city so badly that it was declared inhospitable and everyone who didn’t evacuate would be sealed off and left to fend for themselves. The event was called No Man’s Land, and I guess it was DC’s way to have a canonical apocalyptic wasteland for Batman and buddies to run around in. If you haven’t read it, you really should. No Man’s Land, even to this day, is absolutely fantastic, complex, and well-done. Also, it’s like 80 different issues tying in every Batman family title for over a year.
Let sad Batman explain better than I can:
Today, we’re going to take a look at the Fear of Faith arc, which took place in Batman: Legends of the Dark Knight #116, Batman: Shadow of the Bat #83, Batman #564, and Detective Comics #731, all four issues written by Devin K. Grayson and drawn by Dale Eaglesham.
With food and water running short and psychopathic supervillains parading around town, most of the remaining citizens spend their time scavaging food or hiding in makeshift shelters. Gangs and Bat family members spray-paint their symbols on the wall, signalling troublemakers that they control or protect the area.
Oh yeah, and one of those citizens is Dr. Jonathan Crane, the Scarecrow. You know him. That crazy psychologist who specializes in fear gas while robbing banks and getting roundhouse’d by Batman. Regardless of his past, his intentions remain completely harmless. Well, currently anyway.
When rats eat all the church supplies, Scarecrow pulls a few strings to get some new food. Turns out he knows a guy. Unfortunately, it’s the Penguin.
A deal with the devil! How delightfully ironic! Speaking of which, what’s Batman up to?
Oh, normal stuff. Batman being preoccupied leaves Scarecrow to manipulate churchgoers and Huntress to threaten henchmen to their heart’s content.
Okay, Black Mask’s former gang, the Black Maskers (I’m serious), left to form their own little group. Mikey left the new gang after a change of morality to which Scarecrow begs him to go back to ask for their protection from even eviler thugs. It goes about as you expect.
With the deck rigged, time for Scarecrow to play his cards.
Just because Crane possesses no superpowers doesn’t mean he’s not a superjerk. If you ever wonder why Batman keeps bringing his rogue gallery back to Arkham Asylum time and time again, it’s because most of them are actually insane. Like Scarecrow. And that letter he delivers to Huntress? Stirring up trouble, of course.
Why the weapons reveal? Because Scarecrow’s chips are all in while he bets a blind on a full house. I’m not really good at poker analogies. Think about this for a moment. Why did Scarecrow send Mikey to ask the Black Maskers for help? Certainly because Mikey would get hurt, but more importantly, now the Black Maskers know about the massive, secret weapon stash.
How much death and suffering can one man cause with just rhetoric? Crane intends to find out.
But the stakes aren’t high enough. After all, Scarecrow’s a supervillain. That title takes a reputation years in the making. How about a few more dangerous factors thrown into the mix?
C’mon, Scarecrow. You can do better than that.
Oh, much better. Now we get a pentagram of problems. The churchgoers, Black Maskers, Penguin’s crew, the Gotham City police, and Batman all striking a match on this powder keg with Huntress alone trying to keep down the upcoming slaughter. Not enough crossbow arrows in the world for that, sweetheart.
Unfortunately, Huntress can only sit back and watch the situation cave in on itself. Well, until Gotham’s savior enters the fray to kick his way to peace.
With the chaos outside under control, Huntress can solve the one major problem still left.
If you ever ask me why I enjoy this arc so much, the ending delights me every time I read it. So many stories end with a punch in the face or a giant explosion. Not this one. Huntress, for all her violent and impulsive methods, defeats the Scarecrow using only love. And it’s beautiful.
Despite the potential of the new DC universe, I’m going to miss Bertinelli.
Arousing Grammar 